Too proud to ask for help and struggling with a terminal cancer diagnosis, missed opportunities by care services meant John Lowe felt he had no choice but to kill his wife with a hammer before taking his own life.
These were the findings of a domestic homicide review (DHR) published by the Isle of Wight Council which revealed that opportunities were missed to provide support for the Shanklin couple.
Left note on the front door
A retired avionics engineer, 77-year-old Mr Lowe from Albert Road, Shanklin, killed his 83-year-old wife, Jean, in June 2016, by striking her on the head before using a scarf to asphyxiate her.
A note was left on the door for the paper-boy that said, ‘I’m sorry but do not come into the home for the two of us Lowes are dead.’
Mrs Lowe had been suffering from undiagnosed dementia at the time of her death.
Missed opportunities
There were missed opportunities by care services to consider how Mr and Mrs Lowe were managing to care for each other while living with deteriorating health and the couple were ‘too proud’ to ask for help.
The couple hid their worsening situation from everyone except family and neighbours and no carer assessment was carried out. The DHR said it did not occur to anyone to enquire how they were coping, or to consider their complex care and support needs.
Had annual health checks been in place, professionals would have realised the couple were struggling to look after one another.
Letter to GP
Although there were no obvious signs of domestic abuse, in 2008 Mr Lowe wrote to his GP that he was ‘looking for domestic trouble’ and to ‘ask his wife’. However, no one enquired further.
A short time later, Mr Lowe insisted on being present during a routine doctors appointment for his wife’s dry cough. The report said these two events should have been pieced together and attempts made to ascertain whether Mrs Lowe was safe.
Declined services offered
The review into their deaths accepts it would not have been easy to persuade the couple to accept support, as Mrs Lowe had made it clear she did not want help.
The couple did not welcome help from outsiders and the vast majority of services they were offered were declined.
Declining health
Mr Lowe, who was six years his wife’s junior, had been expecting to outlive her.
However, given his terminal diagnosis, he expressed concern he would be admitted to hospital and would not come back out — and worried about how Mrs Lowe would cope without him.
In recent months Mrs Lowe had become increasingly forgetful, particularly when her children came to visit.
Final goodbye
He began to sell over half the couple’s possessions and compiled a 30-page instruction manual on how everything in the house worked.
Mr Lowe also manufactured a final goodbye with family members, shortly before their deaths.
Not predictable or preventable
The report concluded that although the Lowes may not have accepted an additional support, they were not offered the opportunity to do so. However, there was no evidence to suggest that what happened was either predictable or preventable.
This article is from the BBC’s LDRS (Local Democracy Reporter Service) scheme, which OnTheWight is taking part in. Some additions by OnTheWight. Ed
