Yes, it’s Monday not Saturday, but here’s a little something from Daft Old Duffer to ponder over. Ed
No5 had a pop at me recently over the size of my self-esteem. And Sally promptly responded with the news that a total of ninety two of my articles had been put out to date, and that I was beloved of kings and princes throughout the Empire. (Well, that last may be overstating it a bit I suppose)
Ninety two! And to think when Sal first asked me to contribute I turned her down on the grounds that no-one, but a conceited orifice of the fundament, could believe he had something worthwhile to say each and every week. A point still not in dispute perhaps.
Through the digital shredder?
No5 does have a point however. In fact when I sent in my piece ‘Back Off Or I’ll Bite Your Ankle’ I half expected Sal to put it straight through the digital shredder – as she has with more than one of my efforts.
I was relieved therefore when she decided to put it out. The Lady quite obviously knows her market and what it will put up with. (Incidentally, the idea that Sal puts up my pieces merely by pressing a couple of buttons before going off for a lie-down is bluntly, ill-informed nonsense. All I do is send in my screed and leave Sal to form it into proper paragraphs, insert sub headings etc. It’s called editing and it’s not something that can be rushed).
What’s so special about me?
Yet No5 is not alone, I know, in wondering why I get to express my views on the front page as it were, while everyone else’s is confined to the Forum.
Perhaps my cupid-bow lips, curly eyelashes and dimpled cheeks have something to do with it.
But bear in mind four things dear fellow Bloggers.
Not everything is published
First, when you send in your views and comments they are sure of publication – provided of course they are reasonably decent. Whereas mine – as asserted above – are not infrequently binned. No ifs or buts.
Which is a bit hard after I’ve gone through several revisions in an attempt to render my prose as deathless as possible.
I aim to raise debate
Second, I do leave myself open to your mercy. When I pen one of my masterpieces it is in the hope it will form the basis for general discussion. And when it doesn’t – when no-one bothers to reply, I feel abandoned and shattered.
Yes – beneath this hard boiled exterior lies the beating heart of a timid woodland creature.
You and I are read far and wide
And third – just as my stuff is read over a far wider range than just our Island, so is yours.
Compare that to what happens when Indignant of Ventnor writes in to the local paper. He, or she will be subject to both the Editors censorship and the space he’s allotted for letters that week. Which in turn depend principally on the success of his sales department in securing adverts.
In any event, no more than one letter will appear – at most. No chance of any prolonged discussion.
Which is one of VentnorBlog’s strong points.
Don’t just sit there
Finally four – Sal is always on the lookout for contributors, so rather than mutter about me occupying the high ground feel free to have a go yourself. Just don’t assume your every word is golden just because it gleams in your eye. Leaving the safety of the Forum can be quite a shock to the system, believe you me.
Returning to my own scribblings however – what do you think? Am I sticking my neck out too far as No5 asserts? Do I need to shut up a bit? A lot? Let the world know. This is, after all, your Blog.
Bear in mind that few or no replies to those questions will be interpreted as general approval and I shall sail on proudly, gazing with my clear blue eyes at distant horizons.
On the other hand if you respond by giving me a bit of a kicking I promise not to sulk about it.
Well, maybe just a bit.
Image: sidewalk flying under CC BY 2.0
