Daft Old Duffer gets straight in with his first Sunday column of 2012. Here’s to many more. Ed
So now we’ve all seen the much-hyped Frozen Planet series, and we’ve all stood around, cap in hand listening in respectful silence while the great Richard told us what a wonderful, magic, world-shattering experience it’s all been for lucky us.
Well, now the dust has settled a little let me pop my head above the parapet, glance nervously around in case someone’s wielding a shot gun, and tell you what I think.
A monstrous con
I think it’s all been a monstrous con.
When I was a kid, the staple of Sunday cinema was various assorted cowboys in white hats galloping about and loosing off their 150-shooters at cowboys in black hats. And I read somewhere that many of these all-the-same features were made-up of film edited out of other episodes, cobbled together with perhaps a touch of extra dialogue, and presented as something entirely new.
Deja vu?
That’s what I believe happened with Frozen World.
I think that when the Richard began dropping hints about retiring to his pipe and slippers, some Slick Alec at the Beeb said, “hold on a minute old ‘un, I’ve had an idea. Why don’t we cobble together some of that unused footage from all your previous travels and make one last epic show of it? All we need do is fly you out to a lump of ice somewhere so you can say a few words to camera – don’t matter much what – get a camera crew to wander off and risk their lives a time or two, and hey presto, bob’s your uncle and QED, we’ll have a whole new blockbuster to sell around the world.”
So that’s what they did. And all would have been well – it was all authentically unseen stuff as promised after all, even if more than a touch samey – except perhaps for two things. Our Rich didn’t actually do anything this time. Except talk of course. And someone found out Slick Alec had slipped in that Hamburg Zoo shot of mummy bear and the kids.
Excuses, excuses
Since when there appeared to have been a bit of embarrassed silence, a bit of shoe-shuffling and random mumble about how warm it is for the time of year.
And I would be surprised if Slick Alec hasn’t been promoted.
Image: Beverly and Pack under CC BY 2.0
