school dress

Isle of Wight parents to sue over boy wearing dress to school

An Isle of Wight couple made the front page of the Sunday Times yesterday, as they threaten to legally challenge an Isle of Wight school Church of England primary school for allowing a six year old boy to wear a dress to school.

Nigel and Sally Rowe made most of the national newspapers and also appeared on BBCR4’s Today programme this morning (Monday), speaking about their concerns.

Parents: “We found this concerning”
They told the BBC presenter their concerns were raised when their son came home from school saying “I’m confused, I don’t know what’s going on,” after a boy was allowed to wear a dress to school.

Sally Rowe said,

“We always say you should love everyone, but as Christians we found this concerning. Some days he was dressed as a girl, and some days dressed as a boy.”

Father: “There are boys, and there are girls”
The presenter asked whether there was anything other than the clothes that worried them or their son.

Nigel Rowe replied,

“Yes, identifying some days as a boy and some days as a girl, for us is very difficult, it’s inconsistent. Our son was brought up in the way there are boys and there are girls.”

The parents agreed they would not be concerned if girls wore trousers to school.

“That’s normal,” said Nigel.

Father: “We were concerned for welfare of all children”
He went on to explain he and his wife wrote a letter setting out their points.

“We did get a staunch letter back, we love the school, we love the parents and the students. Letter said under Equality Act this is how it will be. Children can come in as they wish, boys, girls can dress anyway they like. We were concerned for welfare of all children, worried it’s going to cause confusion.”

The presenter said if the parents of the child were happy, the diocese had said it was legal and that pupils should learn to respect diversity of all kinds, what was the problem

Nigel replied,

“From our perspective all kids are equal, but we have boys and we have girls. It’s within our DNA. A child of six years old does not have the mental capacity to work out that kind of thing.”

Better judge than child’s parents?
Asked by the presenter whether Nigel and his wife were a better judge than the child’s own parents, health officials or school, Nigel replied,

“We’re in a public space. This is not the place for this agenda.”

Father: Disagree about bullying
The presenter went on to explain the growing evidence of a rise in self harm and suicide of transgender children and adults because they are not accepted.

Nigel replied,

“I don’t believe that’s the case, not because they are transgender, I don’t believe people are bullying them in any way.”

Mother: “Should be dealt with in private sphere”
Sally Rowe added that their second child was very unhappy and wanted to change schools because of it. She went on to say,

“If a child has gender confusion it needs to be done in private setting. It’s a massive thing for a six year old, they need support, love and compassion and it should be dealt with in a private sphere first and not in a school where it affects many people.”

Diocese: “Church of England schools .. respect diversity of all kinds”
Jeff Williams, director of education for the Diocese of Portsmouth, said:

“Church of England schools are inclusive environments where pupils learn to respect diversity of all kinds. Like any other state school, our schools comply with the legal requirements of the Equalities Act 2010. Among other things, this requires schools to accept the wishes of children and their families with regard to gender identity. It would be unlawful for any of our schools to do otherwise.

“Because our schools have a Christian ethos, we also believe that children of all faiths and those with none should all feel equally welcomed, valued and nurtured as children of God within our learning communities.”

The Isle of Wight council have said they would not be commenting on the matter as this is a diocese run school.

Article edit
9.50am Comment from Diocese added.

Image: barneymoss under CC BY 2.0

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paul
11, September 2017 11:56 am

These parents do not represent the views of most parents at this school. The school has been rated good by OFSTED & is held in the highest regard by almost every other parent I know. I’m glad that my son attends this school with it’s open, tolerant and welcoming attitude. The school enables children to flourish and reach their full potential, be they girls, boys, questioning, trans… Read more »

mildedric
Reply to  paul
11, September 2017 10:17 pm

Children of average body size, who believe themselves to be very overweight and suffer mental trauma due to this misconception, are treated for a mental health issue. If a child with a penis believes he is a girl he is given a dress and we are supposed to ‘support’ the poor thing. Those who question this are accused of ‘hate crimes’ while limp wristed ‘liberals’ use it… Read more »

Caconym
Reply to  mildedric
11, September 2017 10:44 pm

It is a matter for the child’s parents and healthcare professionals. Not for a pair of swivel-eyed religious fundamentalist zealots who are annoyed that their overprotected, cotton-wool wrapped children are upset that boys wish they were girls. As for being “hate crimes”? This lad. Six years old, could have continued under the care of the professionals mentioned above. One way or another he would have resolved his… Read more »

mildedric
Reply to  Caconym
11, September 2017 11:24 pm

I agree that this is a matter for the child’s parents and health care professionals. Sadly, it would appear that they have signally failed in their duty of care and instead opted for the ‘progressive’ approach of attempting to force people who are uncomfortable with their choice to accept it. I see nothing in the report that leads me to believe them to be ‘swivel-eyed religious fundamentalist… Read more »

Caconym
Reply to  mildedric
11, September 2017 11:47 pm

Well, there we will have to differ as I see nothing in that report to indicate that they are anything other than swivel-eyed fundamentalist zealots.

Rowan
Reply to  paul
12, September 2017 7:36 am

Totally agree, except that you don’t need to be ‘transgender’ to want to wear a particular item of clothing – skirt or trousers or dress or whatever. This is about freedom to wear whatever clothes we feel comfortable in. Forcing people to wear something or forbidding them from wearing something else simply because of their gender is no different from forcing people to wear or not wear… Read more »

mildedric
Reply to  Rowan
13, September 2017 11:45 pm

Sadly this isn’t about the right to wear what one wants; it’s about children under threat of ‘sanction’ (punishment) for using what for millenia has been the right word but has now been deemed wrong.

Nitonia
11, September 2017 12:23 pm

Amazes me when people use their “It’s my beliefs” card. These people don’t follow the bible word for word they just use whichever convenient verse they can to justify their own bigotry and prejudice.

Caconym
11, September 2017 1:09 pm

—“We’re in a public space. This is not the place for this agenda.”— But they decided to thrash it out in the very public sphere of the courts, newspapers and radio? —“Sally Rowe added that their second child was very unhappy and wanted to change schools because of it”— And how many other children are “unhappy”? Few, I suspect, as the Rowe’s are the only ones making… Read more »

Robert Jones
11, September 2017 2:24 pm

I’m just amazed – and delighted – by the attitude of the school. Just imagining what my primary school headmistress, the late Miss Hammett, would have said if a boy had turned up in a dress is enough to chill the blood. (And blast the eardrums – she had a voice you could hear over a monsoon….)

tw1t
11, September 2017 3:47 pm

Hi, as someone who wears a kilt most of the time I feel for the young person. Certainly he should be allowed to wear whatever he pleases within reason. Actually it possibly would be a good idea for all young children to actually wear skirts or dresses. The reason is two fold, firstly the kids would have a greater respect for each other and there would also… Read more »

Tim
11, September 2017 3:57 pm

Hasn’t the Bishop already set a precedent with his work apparel?

miche74
11, September 2017 5:26 pm

I think it’s very brave of the little lad at that age to be comfortable in his own skin many children who feel that way hide their feelings. Good on the parents and the school for allowing him to dress the way he chooses.. What the rowes should be saying to their own child is that’s how he wants to be so that’s how it is. Before… Read more »

mildedric
Reply to  miche74
11, September 2017 10:37 pm

There are people who identify as animals (yes, I know it sounds absurd but it’s true, look it up). Should a child who identifies not as one of the opposite gender but as, say, a stoat or a wilderbeast or perhaps a coypu be supported in their new identity? Should they be allowed to school in a furry suit? And of course there’s the matter of toilets;… Read more »

hialtitude
Reply to  mildedric
12, September 2017 6:33 am

This is about a child, with gender issues, shame on you. Intolerance is very unbecoming.

mildedric
Reply to  hialtitude
13, September 2017 9:05 am

A boy, six years old, arrives at school in a dress and announces that sometimes it’s a boy and sometimes it’s a girl. The school authority then annonces that all the other six year old children will be sanctioned (ie punished) for ‘misgendering’ it – ie calling it ‘him’ when it feels like a girl AND ‘her’ when it feels like a boy. And you call this… Read more »

Caconym
Reply to  mildedric
13, September 2017 2:07 pm

The likes of Orwell and Huxley wrote about dystopian futures where the freedom of people is repressed and any impure thoughts or actions are severely punished. How ironic that you are, therefore, quoting Orwell in support of a pair of religious authoritarians who are going to extreme lengths to subjugate the freedom of a child to be who they want to be. Telling the truth, by the… Read more »

Rowan
Reply to  mildedric
12, October 2017 8:01 am

I entirely agree about telling the truth. There’s no doubting that if somebody has XX chromosomes and female genitals then they’re female, and if they’ve got XY chromosomes and male genitals then they’re male, and pretending otherwise does nobody any good. But the issue is rather about our society’s attitude to gender, which is to make it so divisive that we even have different pronouns for men… Read more »

Rowan
Reply to  mildedric
12, September 2017 7:52 am

The toliet issue is easily resolved.

Get rid of the stupidly unhygienic bullying headquarters that are separate cubicles in rooms labelled for boys or girls.

Replace them with lots of individual inclusive rooms, each with its own door, toilet and washbasin.

hialtitude
11, September 2017 7:11 pm

I find it hard to think of anything charitable to say about the Rowe’s attitude.

If the child is confused about their gender identity then I imagine that the fuss they are making about this is never going to help matters or the child. It would be better for all if they simply kept their views to themselves.

iowdave
12, September 2017 7:27 am

I wonder if this 6year old actually has gender issues. I think it more likely that the parents are taking the micky at the boy’s expense when others at the school ridicule him.

Caconym
Reply to  iowdave
12, September 2017 8:29 am

On what grounds do you make that assertion?

What are your qualifications to make this assertion?

What is your knowledge of this situation that gives you the insight to make this assertion?

jarundel
12, September 2017 9:16 am

Congratulations to this school and the parents of the boy who chooses his uniform.
As an eleven year old newly elected to the school council I remember the campaigning to allow girls to wear trousers and now it is commonplace, even mandatory.
Wear your school uniform with pride!

sebb
12, September 2017 9:44 am

pretty ridiculous for the Christian parents to become so alarmed IMHO – chill out! monday’s broadcast on bbc radio 4 – today – http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p05frflf susie green from mermaids on (Tuesday) radio 4’s `today` – 2 hours and 50 minutes approx. into programme. http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b0930znz empowering and facilitating trans – mermaids – http://www.mermaidsuk.org.uk for those who oppose trans – https://www.transgendertrend.com on premier Christian news web site : https://www.premier.org.uk/News/UK/Christian-parents-say-sons-struggled-and-were-confused-with-having-a-transgender-classmate david… Read more »

Caconym
Reply to  sebb
13, September 2017 2:13 pm

Oh my.

Read that Premier News link at your peril.

Such a lot of vicious, nasty, people pretending to be “Christians”. Some of the comments actually made my skin crawl.

mildedric
Reply to  Caconym
14, September 2017 12:02 am

Madam, you said:- “Telling the truth, by the way, is only a revolutionary act when you are actually telling the truth. All you are doing is having a swivel-eyed rant, and that really doesn’t count.” Leaving your rather angry insult aside, the truth is that this child is 100% male. That it ‘feels’ female sometimes (and male at others) is of no relevance to the truth. And… Read more »

Caconym
Reply to  mildedric
14, September 2017 1:23 am

That wasn’t an “angry” insult, deary, that was an honest appraisal of your mindset.

I could now add “confused” to “swivel-eyed rant” after the above pile of gibberish.

mildedric
Reply to  Caconym
15, September 2017 8:31 pm

I note that rather than dealing with what I have said you have taken the usual resort of limp liberals when faced with scientific truth by ignoring it.

Caconym
Reply to  Caconym
15, September 2017 10:43 pm

Love how swivel-eyed neo-cons think their gibberish is “scientific fact”

temperance
12, September 2017 8:53 pm

Why that’s all? girls wear trouser so the kid (boy) can still wear trousers and think hes a girl (which he ain’t) This world and the liberal elite wont be happy till we’re all mixed race and unsexed and unnatural people.

Robert Jones
13, September 2017 7:20 pm

If you raise children to think in tramlines, never deviating from the set course, this is what you’re going to get – of course they’ll be confused when they encounter circumstances for which their upbringing has not prepared them. Just thinking about it for a second, I realize how much this explains about the intolerance – racial and gender based – which exists in the world today.… Read more »

mildedric
Reply to  Robert Jones
15, September 2017 8:34 pm

What say you about the punishment threatened by the school authorities to six year olds who use what they deem (through Orwellian newspeak)the ‘wrong’ words?

Robert Jones
Reply to  mildedric
15, September 2017 9:17 pm

That would rather depend on what the ‘wrong words’ were, which is not a point raised in the article, but may have been in subsequent posts; I haven’t read through all of them. Supply a bit of chapter and verse, or point me to the post, and I shall endeavour to respond.

Rowan
Reply to  Robert Jones
16, September 2017 9:05 am

Well said Robert. Our society’s ideas about gender are like a form of mental apartheid or segregation – as you say, tramlines, in which we get trapped. We need to grow out of this mental slavery, and think of ourselves as human beings, with every individual having their own potential, and their gender being only one among many aspects of their identity. For far too many people,… Read more »

Rowan
Reply to  Rowan
16, September 2017 9:07 am

Oops, didn’t spot the stupid autocorrects that turned ‘sorts’ into ‘sports’, or ‘own’ into ‘one’.
(I did at least spot ‘apartheid’ getting turned into ‘partied’.)

Caconym
Reply to  Rowan
16, September 2017 12:11 pm

Nicely put.

temperance
14, September 2017 9:16 pm

Transgender parents not helping.