VB reader and carer of a daughter with severe learning disabilities, Hazel Wyld, has asked us to publish this open letter to all Isle of Wight County Councillors. We were happy to oblige. Ed
Reading the press reports and listening to the media reporting it is sad to say that we are coming over as utterly opposed to each others viewpoint when clearly the best interests of us all should be for the welfare of those most vulnerable amongst us.
I put my hand up for taking some of the responsibility for this, as a parent I get angry and frustrated and I’m sure this comes through loud and clear.
The truth is, it’s frustrating when we feel unconsulted and to hear that various managers etc are in agreement adds fuel to the flames.
Hear it from the horse’s mouth
We are the most directly involved, we care on a daily basis, we strive to do the best we can for our never going to grow up children. You who do not live with this can, with all due respects, have no idea of how our lives are governed by having to care for a grown up child, who changes our lifestyle in a way you can not even begin to imagine.
Along with that comes the sadness that they will never live the lives your children have, they won’t go to University or away with their pals on a holiday, or back pack round the world, marry and raise grandchildren for us to enjoy.
We are very aware that very little is given to them and when we see that as threatened, of course we get angry.
How will it be better?
You appear to believe that their lives would be enriched by the move to “The Gouldings”. We see them as losing more than they are gaining. One carer told me that she visited The Gouldings, commented on the smallness of the living area and was told that they were going to provide TVs in their bedrooms so they could retire to their own rooms.
At Westminster House there is ample living space for them to mix and get some kind of social interaction.
We know how much they enjoy the social activities in Newport that just aren’t available in Freshwater.
I’m not even going to mention the increased costs of travel and all the other things that have been brought up so many times.
I suppose I am asking, in spite of the angry letter I have sent earlier this week to the County Press and the interview no doubt going out on Isle of Wight radio today, couldn’t we come together and really consult?
Speak to those most closely affected
I know you say you are going to do that, but you need to talk to us, not care managers. You mention the Whole Life Group, but listening last night, it sounded as though only one carer was represented and he feels there were objections that have not even been mentioned, the impression given was everybody was happy.
It’s hard to trust when you make it clear how much in favour you are of this move. It makes it hard to believe you will come to us unbiased. It would be helpful if we call a meeting to which you are invited, and some of you actually turn up. Other councilors manage to do so.
All we ask is that you come and listen to us with an open mind.
Image: freddyfromutah under CC BY 2.0
